Ranting ’bout Bathrooms | Storytime Animation

This is a video I’ve been planning to make
for quite some time now… And since I think it’s a little too late for
a valentine’s day video, I finally can get around to making this. So… Bathrooms! My average visit to a public bathroom goes
a little something like this. Okay, lets see, uh, okay that one’s locked. Also Locked. Locked. Oooohh, i’m definitely not going in there! So I finally find an okay enough looking stall,
you maybe there is some toilet paper on the floor, but whatever, I got to go pretty bad
So I walk inside and then I get to it, the self-flushing toilets… Oh god, self-flushing, auto-flushing toilets,
whatever you want to call them. If there was a list a of stupidest inventions
in the world, these would probably rank first place. Let me explain. Number 1: They don’t work, yep! Literally, they flush when you don’t want
them to and they don’t flush when you want them to. So sometimes, the stall has like run out of
that cover paper and I don’t know about you guys, but I’m not too keen on putting
my butt on that gross toilet. I mean you knows how many butts have touched
it before. So then, you know the thing where you do like
the squat thingy but where you’re half stand up. So I’m literally squatting, but on top of
the toilet. Its like wall sits, but much worse. And you’re legs are shaking really hard,
maybe cause you’re really off-balance or maybe because it’s freezing in there. So i’m in the middle of this long poop, and
I’m trying to relax, you know? And then I hear it… that horrible sound… Oh no… Noo, don’t flush!!! Ugghhh!! And then the toilet flushes, in the middle
of my poop! So I’m still pooping here maybe 10 seconds
later and then I hear it again, oh no, it better not! It flushes AGAIN! And then as I’m trying to wipe and I hear
the sound again. Oh god no! So I’m wiping frantically now so that is
doesn’t flush before I’m finished. But usually it still flushes to fast and I
have to flush again afterward because the toilet paper floated back up to the top. So how many flushes was that? 1,2,3,4. 4 flushes! Now usually when you hear the toilet flush
in a public bathroom you expect a door to open and someone to pop out. So I usually just hope there’s nobody there
cause if the toilet keeps flushing you start wondering what people are doing in there. And then, on the other hand, when you actually
are just going for a quick pee, it never flushes, like you finish, stand up and then wait. And the toilet does nothing! I usually just press that button to make it
flush, but it seems like most people don’t. Which brings me to my second point! Number 2: They teach kids bad habits. Like kids just don’t flush anymore! They just expect it to flush and just walk
away. So literally, all the toilet are not flushed
the entire day until the janitor comes in and flushes them all! Okay, I mean that’s a little exaggerated,
but I mean the toilets are still pretty gross okay? Okay, and this was a while back, but I was
at this coding class. And it was hosted at a tech company office
building. And I got my first experience with fancy toilets. Yeah, so I don’t know what you call them,
but it had like a seat warmer, some buttons and you know, that type of stuff. And okay, the seat warmer was kind of weird,
I mean it really just felt like somebody had just put their warm butt there, but whatever,
it was still pretty comfy. So I decided to start playing with the buttons,
and see what they do. So I pressed one of the buttons and then suddenly
this stream of water started spraying into my butt. I freaked out and immediately jumped from
my seat. I thought broke it and started getting images
of like
the bathroom flooding. But apparently it was supposed to do that,
Anyway I don’t think I’ll be going to any of those toilets any time soon.

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